Noah 2006

The heavens opened this weekend over the skies in Israel, dumping 2 months worth of rain in one 36 hour period. Parts of the country were flooded and in others there were unbelievable flows of nature as rushes of water carried the summer's dry dirt down streams and over rocks to form powerful muddy waterfalls and flash floods. The streets of Jerusalem, where the rain was relatively light compared to the rest of the country, were full of water as people scurried back and forth from synagogue.

In Israel, if it does not rain in the winter, we don't drink or water our lawns in the summer. It is that simple. With all of the modern technology, we are still completely dependent on rain here. There is a verse in Deuteronomy which spells this out specifically, "for the rains of the heavens you will drink water," and it is true today just the same. I could not avoid noticing that as the heavens poured on us, we were in Shul (synagogue) reading the weekly torah portion of Noah. The Torah describes the flood and Noah's ark. I also took note of the reasons the Bible lays out for the flood: Hamas, translated as stealing or thuggery. Noah's contemporaries developed an immoral and unethical society, built on theft, bribery and illicit relationships.

With the rain pouring down and that context, I could not help but think of our current predicament in Israel. Half the government is under investigation for corruption; the country's president is under investigation for sexual harassment and well, Hamas, pick your translation. Either literal or otherwise will do. Aside from the blessing that is rain, it was pretty depressing. I began to think of the words of the great Bill Cosby in his Noah routine:

"Yeah, well I got news for you (Noah speaking to the Lord)
I'm sick and tired of this whole mess
The whole neighborhood's out there laughing at me
They're all having a grand time
At good old old Noah there
I went out there at my best friend Larry
I've been talking to the Lord, Larry
Larry said
Oh, really
Yeah yeah
Lord, Larry, Larry, Lord
You walked off laughing
And I hear 'em all laughing at me
You know I'm the only guy in this neighborhood with an Ark?
People around here laughing
Picket signs walking up and down
I'm sick and tired of this stuff here
People walking around here
How you doing Tarzan?
How's everything up there?.
Sick and tired of this mess here
You supposed to know all and see all
You let me go out there
And bring in a pregnant elephant
You give me no manual for delivery or nuthin'
Never told me the thing was pregnant
There's good old Noah waitin' underneath the elephant there
Brrrrroooooooooom
Right on top
Sick and tired of this mess here
Had enough all this stuff
For you runnin' around
You supposed to know all and see all
Like I said before
You let me go out there and do all this stuff here
You never even looked in the bottom of that Ark
Have you looked down there?
No?
Who's gonna clean up that mess down there?
That's me"

We, the citizens of Israel, are all modern day Noah's, steering our own family and community arks around the corruption that pervades our leadership and "cleaning up this mess." Like Noah's neighbors, our leaders may laugh at us or stomp on us or even disregard us in their own pursuits of money or power but at the end of the day we are just and moral people who DO need to go out and clean up this mess and clean out these people, as Cosby says "

"Well I'm sick and tired of this I've had enough of this stuff
I've been working all day
Working on it for days and days
I'm sick and tired of this
Noah!
Yeah?
How long can you tread water?

And you got it rainin'
It's not a shower is it?
Ok Lord me and you right
'Cause I knew it all the time"

As if to reassure me, this morning on my way to Tel Aviv at 6AM, there was a giant rainbow* (I mean huge,) that extended up and above the highway and down on the other side, accompanying me from Shaar Hagay (entrance to Jerusalem Hills) all the way to Tel Aviv. It was a beautiful sight and one that provides hope to all of us Noahs out there who hope it does not take another flood to rid ourselves of the thuggery and corruption which surrounds us.

*For the biblically inclined, open a נצי"ב and see his explanation of the rainbow and its symbolism.

Check out this incredibly cool UI of the future - Thanks to Koby for the pointer

Amir Peretz's Babysitter"S"

I don't know whether to laugh or cry! (all the way back on June 11th I started crying)

Prime Minister Ohlmert brings in Avigdor Lieberman's party to shore up his coalition and appoints Lieberman Minister of Strategic Threats (what the hell is that anyway?) to babysit for incompetent Defense Minister Amir Peretz. Peretz pouts and puts on a show that he might leave the coalition so Ohlmert dips into the taxpayers pockets again and buys a $4 per hour Labor Party babysitter by agreeing to appoint Ephraim Sneh as Assistant Defense Minister.

I guess what we learn from this is that Peretz realizes that he is out of his depth but wants his own party hack so he can keep this very public dirty secret it in the Labor Party family. And, as with anything that Peretz is involved with from Histadrut strikes to national defense, we the citizens end up paying for it.

"Lieberman" Is In the Coalition

Avigdor Lieberman and his party Yisrael Beiteinu just joined Prime Minister Ehud Olmert's coalition. Or, should I say Lieberman joined and the dwarfs followed. I read the hastily signed coalition agreement and could not believe my eyes: The first 6 points deal with Lieberman's hodgepodge ministry for strategic threats, the next point says that "with Lieberman's joining as a minister, so too his party follows," and the last 2 points are some amorphous language about changing the electoral system and solving problems for those who can't marry under the law.

Is this a joke? The tax payer is going to pay for a big staff for a new ministry that would not even be needed if the National security council worked properly or if the defense minister Amir Peretz was not totally incompetent. Every other coalition partner got one minister for every 4 MKs and Yisrael Beiteinu brings 12 MKs and gets one minister - Lieberman.

Here is what I get from this agreement:
1. Olmert is desperate to shore up the government in advance of the budget vote
2. Olmert figured out that Peretz is incompetent but can't figure out how to get rid of him so he got him a baby sitter
3. Olmert does not trust the Labor party so he bought an insurance policy
4. There is no such thing as Yisrael Beitenu. They should rename it the Lieberman party.
5. Lieberman broke his election promise that nobody remembers anymore that he was only taking the Internal Security Ministry but now is dealing with Iran and the Hezbollah so he can say he is "taking one for the country."
6. We now have a government made up of:

• a party whose electability has crumbled and has 8 members under investigation,
• a party whose leader is viewed as incompetent by most of his own party and is not likely to survive his internal primaries,
• a one man party who had 5 conditions for joining the government and dropped all 5,
• 7 pensioners who can't believe their good fortune to get a Knesset pension on top of their current one
• and Shas...who look like roses in this bunch of thorns in our side.

Need I say more?


Update on Post: My father sent me this link from Anshel Pfeffer in Today's Jerusalem Post. Worth reading.

Jerusalem Post and Shabbat Times - Sad story

A friend of mine forwarded me this email. I thought it was worth posting.

"I usually do not write bulk emails, and certainly not a email that is a criticism, however this is different.

Every year for Sukkot we go to Shmulik's cousins for chag. The *entire* family gets together in Tel Aviv for Sukkot; Shmulik has never missed a Sukkot there since he was born. This is a yearly event that we all look forward to, and it's an opportunity to see everyone, to see how the kids have grown and to celebrate the chag together.

October 6th, erev Chag/Shabbat, I checked the Jerusalem Post internet site for candle-lighting time. It said 6:14.

Our bags were packed, our kids were dressed, and we were ready to leave the house at 5:00, giving us plenty of time for the 20 minute drive to Tel Aviv. Suddenly we got a phone call from Shmulik's mom "Where are you? Chag is now!" I ran back to the computer and saw 6:14 on the Jerusalem Post. I refreshed the page and saw the same thing. Then I looked outside and saw the sun was setting and people walking to shul.

The sinking feeling in my stomach was something horrible. I quickly grabbed the Shabbat platter and turned it on (we had some food in the freezer at least!). The kids were crying, asking when we are going, and I felt so bad for Shmulik and his family… missing out on Sukkot together.

Needless to say I was very upset with the Jerusalem Post. I sent them an email. The email reply I received basically denied there was a mistake on their part. They wrote "It's possible you were viewing either an old or cached page, if this is the case you need to refresh the page or empty out your disk cache (if you're not sure how to do this, call your internet service provider)." (As a note, we had refreshed the page, and Shmuik's cousin's checked it from their house motzi chag and the times were still incorrect….)

I replied with a screen-capture of the page I had taken with the incorrect Shabbat times. The reply I got is as follows:

While it is no excuse, please know that we were extremely short staffed here from Rosh Hashanah and till the end of Sukkot with many of our staff away during the holidays. It's most likely that the times were not updated at all or the times were simply entered incorrectly.

Let me take this opportunity to apologize for any misunderstanding or error on our part re: the shabbbat times posted on our site.

In future, I suggest you check out the Aish link below, which is where we actually get the times to post on our site.

http://www.aish.com/shabbat/candlelighting2.asp

Ok, the Jerusalem Post is a major international newspaper (especially their online site) and they claim to be a trustworthy and dependable source of news… yet they tell me that things are simply entered incorrect -AND they are referring me to ANOTHER website for reliable information? This is absurd (!).

While I will personally not be reading the Jerusalem Post for reliable news, I am passing on this information not to bash the Post, but rather to let you know that when checking Shabbat times, don't count on the Jerusalem Post online. :)

Hope everyone had a great chag!!"

Great PIece on the Future of Media

I highly encourage you to read this piece by Andy Kessler entitled Media 2.uh-oh. It is a both a great survey of where the media world has come to and where it might be going.

The TSA -The 4 Species - at least they are not liquid

I have blogged before about ads in TSA bins. But this TSA advisory is Golden. Fortunately, God did not instruct the Jews to take 4 liquid species, otherwise the TSA would have quite a hoard of Liquid Citrons.

FROM THE TSA via email

STATEMENT OF GUIDANCE: Succot is a significant religious holiday for Jews.
It is 7 days in which observant Jews commemorate the wanderings of their forbearers in the wilderness and celebrate the harvest season. Observant Jews perform special rituals during this time, including the taking of four kinds of plants and incorporating them into daily prayer services. The travel period this year for the Succot holiday will commence several days before the October 6 onset of the holiday (approximately October 1, 2006) and end several days after its October 15 conclusion (approximately October 18, 2006). Jewish travelers may carry four plants - which include a palm branch, myrtle twigs, willow twigs, and a citron - in airports and through the security checkpoints. These plants are religious articles and may be carried either separately or as a bundle. Jewish travelers may be observed in prayer, shaking the bundle of plants in six directions. TSA's standard operating procedures do not prohibit the carrying of such agricultural items through the airport or the security checkpoints, or on aircraft. These plants are not on TSA's Prohibited Items List and are not part of the recent changes made to the Prohibited Items List. TSA's Office of Civil Rights and Liberties has prepared the above information. If you have any questions, contact Stephanie Stoltzfus at 571-227-2363,Stephanie.Stoltzfus@dhs.gov.

Call Israel Free - No Joke!

I saw this post on making free phone calls from the USA to Israel on SeekingAlpha and decided I need to re-post. Read SeekingAlpha post for all the details

"Call 712-858-8883. At the prompt, press 1 for English. Then punch in 011, the country code and the phone number. That’s it. The call rings through immediately."

Curious George - Outdated?

We read our kids at least one book every night at Bedtime. Last night I was reading the original Curious George book to my 4 year old. At one point in the story, Curious George escapes from jail by climbing out on the telephone wires. My son then asked "what are telephone wires?" Now, it could have been an innocent 4 year old's question but it got me thinking that my son is living in a wireless/cordless age and may not know (now or forever) what telephone wires are!

There are 2 implications of this. First, I think the advance of technology into our daily lives may cause our children to lose touch with the classics on a number of levels. Shakespeare is in Old English and requires concentration and a deep vocabulary to understand. Milton requires deep thought and religious sensibilities and all of this in an era where kids have poor English as well as digital ADD, skipping between browsers and using weird abbreviations on IM. Additionally, many of the classic children's stories refer to products and concepts such as rotary phones and wires which are anachronistic today. I worry that all of this will lead to less well-rounded personalities and a less thoughtful next generation.

Second, our generation needs to develop a series of new children's classics or, dare I say, update the old ones so that the kids can relate to them and develop relationships with these old or new classics. I know full well that Curious George cannot traipse across wireless spectrum but we can challenge authors to abandon happy and go-lucky Barney or foul-mouthed (kick your butt) SpongeBob in order to develop a next generation of classics such as Curious George, Madeleine and the truly timeless Dr. Seuss.

I Am Back After the Holiday Hiatus

Having not posted anything for 2 weeks, I am back and starting to write again. What was amazing over the period was how many comments I received during that time....from spammers. I will need to enable kapcha so I can stop spam comments. Sorry for the inconvenience.